RULER

RULER at Home

RULER and Emotional Intelligence: Overview for Families

RULER Skills

RULER is an acronym of the five key skills of emotional intelligence. Read about each skill below!


Recognizing

Recognizing emotions in ourselves and others allows us to:

  • Better understand others
  • Have positive social interactions
  • Work well in groups
  • Know when children need emotional support

Understanding

Knowing the cause of our own feelings and that an event may cause different emotional reactions in each person allows us to:

  • Anticipate, manage, or prevent unwanted feelings in ourselves and others
  • Promote wanted feelings in ourselves and others
  • Support children’s emotional needs

Labeling

Knowing feeling words allows us to:

  • Communicate our feelings
  • Appropriately manage our feelings
  • Help children learn new vocabulary to express their feelings

Expressing

Learning how to display our feelings helps us to:

  • Appropriately act in social situations
  • Properly model social behavior for children

Regulate

Developing strategies to manage feelings allows us to:

  • Be more effective in reaching our goals
  • Feel more, less, or the same of an emotion
  • Make wise choices about how we respond to emotional situations

Practicing RULER at Home:

To create a positive emotional climate at home, it is important to practice the five key skills of emotional intelligence with the children and other members of your family.


Recognizing

To recognize emotions, families can:

  • Pay attention to your emotions and the emotions of your children.
  • Point out and discuss the facial expressions, vocal changes, and body language that reflect different emotions.

Understanding

To understand emotions, families can:

  • Anticipate, manage, or prevent unwanted feelings in ourselves and others 
  • Promote wanted feelings in ourselves and others
  • Support children’s emotional needs

Labeling

To label emotions, families can:

  • Use a wide range of emotion words with children.
  • Encourage children to find the best word to describe their feelings

Expressing

To express emotions, families can:

  • Talk about what your body looks like when you are angry, excited, sad, calm, etc.
  • Help children evaluate the best time, place, and way to express their feelings

Regulate

To regulate emotions, families can:

  • Model different effective strategies for children when you manage your own feelings
  • Help children find useful and successful strategies for managing the range of emotions they experience